As I reflect on 2011 like a lot of do when it comes to an end I feel many emotions. The year started in a long dark tunnel for me. I could not see the light at the end of it. I was in the dark. I thought there was no options for me. I was surrounded by physical pain, emotional pain, and struggling for grasp on my usual zealous and love for life. I had lost my motivation.
About March I re-evaluated, I looked at my children and realized once again, that looking back is not going to help me. Feeling the pain is not going to help me deal with it. Seeing the darkness is not going to let the sun shine. If I let the pain define me, I will be lost. If I lay down, I can not see the road ahead.
At that point, I made some changes in my thinking, which changed me. It took me awhile to find the courage, but once I did (with the help of my son I must admit), I removed the person that I was allowing to affect me in a negative way. I was allowing him to hurt me again and again. It was consuming all of my energy. Once I left that relationship, I have had the focus and energy to make some amazing progress and changes. Many doors have appeared, and opened. I have practiced Qui Gong daily and so much more effectively.
The turmoil of 2011 has paved a new road for me. I will embrace the New Year with open arms, an open mind, and an unbeatable spirit. I will enjoy this road no matter how bumpy it may be. I am surrounded by immense love and it feels great. My small broken family is mighty and we are going to rock 2012. The sunsets will be beautiful, the beaches vast.
It takes more courage to reveal insecurities than to hide them, more strength to relate to people than to dominate them, more ‘manhood’ to abide by thought-out principles rather than blind reflex. Toughness is in the soul and spirit, not in muscles and an immature mind. ~Alex Karras
A fellow blogger Sue wrote:
We will always be tested, but it is important to stop and take a look at the ground we have covered, honoring our achievements, courage and persistence….(please visit her blog, she has some amazing language)
…with that in mind I have re-evaluated and will persevere, move forward with courage and persistence!!
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!